Time of the Month
by promise99
Summary: The lovely ladies of the team are all on the same cycle. And they take it out on a bowling alley, all the while confusing Dick as to what's wrong with them. Total craziness and OOCness.


_Okay, y'all, it's time for an attempted one shot. First one in almost a year. Let's just say that writer's block and being a theatre kid don't mix. I've been so busy that I haven't been able to cure myself of the writer's block. And I'm teaching myself piano, so, yeah. Being an artsy-fartsy kid is fun, just very time consuming. Anyways, this is just a simple one shot to see if I've still got my mojo. _

**Time of the Month**

"Talking"

_Thinking_

Dick's POV

**So, it's the end of April, right? Like, the VERY end of April. Roy just joined the team, which was sweet! But, since he and Artemis were fighting so much, guess who came down on us. That's right: Batman. And BC. **

_I hate this…_

I walked up to the counter nonchalantly. I glanced around me, staring at the obscene wallpaper and paintings on the walls. Nothing says, "Vintage," like an old bowling alley.

"Hey, Dick," said Artemis. "Why did we have to come here anyway? What did we do?"

I glanced over in her general direction. She and Roy were constantly fighting, even now. He kept shooting daggers at her with his eyes. For what reason, God only knows.

"Well, Artemis," I began, "BC and Bats both agreed that since you and Roy can't get along, the team needed to go out and bond for a little while. So, that's why we're in this dingy little bowling alley. Thanks, by the way."

"Whatever…"

* * *

So, I looked at everyone's bowling shoes, and I was totally NOT whelmed. These things were god-awful. It was sad.

"Hey, Dick," said Wally. He was grinning, while stuffing himself with a hot dog from the snack bar and destroying the ghosts in Ms. Pac Man. "How about we make things interesting? Boys vs. girls in team bowling. The winners get foot massages from the losers."

Zatanna looked up. "Dick, that sounds awesome! Let's do this!" I think she was ready to have some fun, what with the loss of her father and all.

So, it was settled, boys vs. girls.

Roy looked at the score board. "Looks like I'm up, followed by Wally, and then Conner. The girls have Artemis first, then Zee, and then Raquel. Guess who's going to win."

Roy grabbed the simple, stereotypical black bowling ball, and as he made his way to the lane, he grinned at Artemis, and blew a kiss at her. He took a few steps back, and he brought his arm forth. Suddenly, he was startled by a, "BOO!", and he threw the ball down the lane.

"Grr! Who did that?" Roy's face was red, and he was practically going to rip someone's head off.

"Sorry, Roy. Looks like you're not so rock-solid after all," taunted Artemis.

"I'll show you rock-solid," Roy muttered.

Wally's head perked up, and he grinned at me. "DUDE! That's what SHE said!"

"Wally, I hate to burst your bubble, but that doesn't make sense."

Conner just HAD to chime in there, didn't he? "Wally? Who is this, "She?" And why does she say such dirty things?"

_Why did I have to get stuck with these idiots? Why me?_

Now it was Artemis' turn to go to the lane. She grabbed a hot pink bowling ball and rolled it down the lane with precision only befitting that of an archer. Of course, she got a strike on the first try.

"Oh, yeah! Suck it, Roy!"

Roy seethed with rage in the corner. As Wally went to the lane, he gave Zatanna a thumbs up.

"Hey, Zee?" Wally asked.

"Yeah?"

"Let's throw the balls at the same time, okay?"

She grinned. "Sure!"

They both threw the balls, and they both went into the gutter. Well, until Zatanna worked her magic on the ball and made it fly through the air.

The next match up was Raquel and Conner. Conner's hands were too big for the holes, so he just chucked it at the pins. And he got a strike!

"Is that good or bad? Because in baseball, a strike is really bad…" Conner asked. It's a shame he's so unsure of himself. He'd be a total badass if he believed in himself.

"Oh, damn! You got it good, boy! I got beat by you, baby!" Raquel exclaimed.

**This went on for about 5 hours, because nobody could break the tie.**

* * *

All the girls on the team were upset. Zatanna, Artemis, and Raquel were furious, and M'gann was just crazy, and nobody knew why.

"Psst! Dick!"

"What do you want, Wally?"

"Dude! The girls on this team are all insane! What's going on?"

"How should I know? I'm 13!"

Kaldur walked up to us during our little chat, and he attempted to explain this to us.

"Wally, I'm sure you know what's going on with the girls. Constant mood swings, cramps, cravings for chocolate…."

Wally's face fell. "No. It can't be. Not all at the same time!"

I glared at them, shrouded in the darkness of ignorance. "What are you guys talking about?"

Kaldur eyed me, strangely. "Nothing, Dick. You'll find out when you're older."

"Find out about what?"

Suddenly, I felt a gust of wind blow past my head. Let's just say that Artemis was lactating with rage, and she was pretty strong.

M'gann walked up to the lane, and tossed the ball. It went off course a little, but she corrected it with a little bit of telekinesis. The guys just stared at her. "What," she said innocently, "Why are you all staring at me? Is there something on my face? "

Wally nodded, and she flipped out. "Oh, God! I'm hideous! I don't deserve to live!"

She kept kicking and screaming so much that Conner had to take her for an ice-cream float to calm her down.

Wally and Kaldur kept giving each other looks. "What are you guys keeping from me? What is the matter with them? Did Klarion put a spell on them? Is Psimon controlling them with telepathy?"

The front door opened. Bruce Wayne ran in the door, the wind trailing behind him. He immediately sat knelt behind the vending machine and hid.

"Bruce! What's wrong?"

Bruce looked up at me and whimpered, "It's Dinah. It's happening to her."

The door opened again, and in strolled Dinah. She grabbed a bottle of coke and pushed Roy away from the lane. She proceeded to bicycle kick the bowling ball down the lane. "We win, boys."

I have never run out of a bowling alley as quickly as I did that day.

_Well, not bad for a year away, if I do say so myself. However, I do trust you guys to give me reviews to tell me how I did. It would tickle me pink if you did. And, of course, you'd get a brownie. :D_


End file.
